Graduation is the culmination of a long term goal. Today, I get to count my success in completing this goal. But, today, I received a spoiler - I'm not getting Summa honors because I don't meet, by their accounting, 60 applicable institutional credits by graduation. By my accounting, there are 60, but two general education classes are not showing up as counting toward institutional credit.
I am so deeply disappointed I am writing this here, a public forum.
For what reason would a returning student work so hard to accomplish a GPA of 3.95 then to say, "I graduated Summa?"
The answer to this question is an even deeper question. That is, "Why do I need honors?"
Honors means something at this time in my life, when taking on a new career and identity is as difficult as it is exciting. Honors means it is worth my time to have taken this journey for the last four years. Honors means I have given it all I have, and that I have a lot to give. Honors means I am above average. Honors allows me to contextualize myself as having some type of head start coming into a career in which I have no professional experience.
Today, I am adorned with my own "bling" - the beads and turquoise that identifies who I am outside of the academic setting. I stand strong and proud to say, "This is who I am." The Summa honor shows I can walk in both worlds equally strong and proud.
The fact that I will not have this honor today is deflating because it means they do not honor me, even after I worked so hard, on their terms.
I went back to school for me. But I wanted the honors because I worked to have them.
